ep 117. Too White to Be Black: Navigating Biracial Identity

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a black executive perspective whether you're aware 

of it or not it's a topic that is often avoided

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we'll discuss race and how it plays a factor 

and how we didn't even talk about this topic

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cuz we were afraid a black executive perspective 

definitely say it didn't make me feel like I

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belonged because growing up the elementary schools 

I went to the people I was around they were all

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only one racial identity and so it felt very much 

like I just wasn't enough of my black side or I

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was too much of my white side so it was always 

like I felt like I belonged but not completely

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welcome to a black executive perspective podcast 

a safe space where we discuss all matters related

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to race especially race and Corporate America 

ost Tony tidbit so in June of: 2007

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and my wife were blessed to have our first girl 

and like most parents we were excited we had her

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room all set up we had little clothes for her we 

had visions of grandeur in terms of you know how

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we're going to set up things for her so she could 

be anything that she wanted to be now some of you

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may know and some of you may not know my wife 

is white so did we really understand what our

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daughter or daughters would go through since they 

were going to be biracial kids listen I know when

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I grew up I went through a lot just being you 

know black right but now my daughter was going

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to be mixed she's going to be part black and part 

white did we understand the implications of how

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she would see the world how the world would see 

her and the things that she would have to deal

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with well today we have four Brave teenagers who's 

going to come on a black executive perspective to

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tell their stories about what they go through 

how they see the world and more importantly how

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the world sees them so let's meet these teenagers 

can do me a favor each one of you guys and we'll

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start with you Marcus tell me your first name how 

old you are and your racial makeup of your mother

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and your father so my name is Marcus I'm 15 years 

old my mom is white and my dad is black great uh

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my name is Cameron I'm 16 years old my mom is 

also white and my dad's also black hi I'm Maya

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I'm 16 my mother is black and my father's white 

hi I'm Michaela I'm 16 and my father is black

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and my mother is white well Marcus Cameron Maya 

Michaela thank you for coming on a black executive

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perspective to talk about this topic obviously you 

know we we're excited to hear your stories awesome

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so why don't we start like this right you know 

Maya your father is white your mother is black

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Cameron your F your mother is white your father 

is black right same thing for you Marcus right and

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then Michaela your father's black and your mother 

is white so and any one of you guys can start off

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with this so tell tell us a little bit how does it 

feel to be a biracial kid so growing up I wasn't

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really comfortable in being biracial m i remember 

one of my like EST feelings when I was like three

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or four is I was watching a Disney Channel show 

and I just really didn't like the way I looked

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comparatively I wanted to look like my father 

growing up he is the epitome of white he is blonde

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with blue eyes very pale skin and when you're 

growing up biracial that's what's presented to

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you so I didn't really see myself as pretty when 

I was younger and I recently learned how to grow

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into that and be more comfortable with my skin 

but most of my life I did not like how I looked or

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anything about myself racially right and so when 

you were saying number one thank you for sharing

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that right so when you said you know when you were 

three you were younger you really didn't like the

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way you look and and what was the part that you 

didn't like about um I think the biggest thing

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for me was I didn't like that I didn't look like 

anyone else in my family or anyone else around me

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really like even my sister I don't look exactly 

like her we have like similar facial structures

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but our curl patterns are different our skin tones 

are slightly different so I just didn't feel like

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I belonged anywhere I wanted to look like my dad 

he was I thought he was very handsome when I was

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little I was like he looks really good I don't 

look anything like that in my opinion and I think

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the thing that made me the most insecure when I 

was younger were my eyes I didn't like how dark

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they were I didn't like it that they didn't really 

have a color okay thanks for sharing anybody else

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I can build off of what Maya said like growing up 

by racial when you're little there wasn't a lot of

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representation for mixed kids like I remember 

we used to get American Girl dolls every year

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and when we go to New York and get the American 

Girl dolls there wasn't one biracial American

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Girl doll there are tons of white American Girl 

dolls one or two like dark skinned black American

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Girl dolls but there wasn't one that looked like 

us and I feel like for a while when I was really

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little I didn't realize I was black because going 

to a white school being one of like five black

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kids in the whole Elementary School being around 

that Community I don't think like it settled into

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me but then there was one day where I was looking 

through like the American grll Magazine cuz that

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was my thing when I was little and I saw all of 

these white girls in there and I didn't see myself

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and I think that's when it clicked when I realized 

oh I am different than the majority and there

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wasn't really anyone for me to like look up to 

or base myself off of and even still now there's

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not very there's not very many mixed people in the 

media you know you have zanda who else like she's

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like a mainstream one that a lot of girls can look 

up to but people have talked about this Rihanna

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and DEA saying that like they're needs to be more 

representation of bir biracial kids in the media

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so like when we're little we can see ourselves um 

as real people in the world instead of looking to

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a different race or different demographic and 

so even though let me just uh I want to back

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up because because I want to because you B guys 

both said something and I just want to back up a

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little bit so you said Michaela you said hey you 

thought you were white right when you were younger

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and until you got the American Girl doll and and 

then you found that you were like hey there's

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nobody that looks like me and then Maya you said 

hey you know I wanted to look like my father you

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know he's handsome and you know I don't like my 

eyes because they're dark and stuff that nature

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so let me ask you guys this question your F your 

mother is black and your father is black so and

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I'll start with you Michaela so when you thought 

you were white when you're young but you had a

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a black father that was there all the time did 

that ever resonate at all did that was that a

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negativity tell me a little bit about that I don't 

think it was a negativity I just don't think like

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I connected the dots I don't know why or how maybe 

it was because of the school I went to like not

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seeing many many other black kids or biracial kids 

I was always with like the white crowd and like um

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you used to work in the city a lot so we would 

be with Mom like during the day going to school

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so when our mom's bringing us everywhere people 

see her as white and so it like kind of reflects

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on the kids if that makes sense no that makes 

perfect sense by anything you want to add to that

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um I think when I was younger I loved the way my 

mother looks I still do I think she's one of the

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prettiest people I know but I saw my dad's look 

as more achievable because we are closer in skin

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tone so why I thought my mother was beautiful 

I just thought I would never be that pretty so

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I was always like I just need to find a moderate 

where I can like be okay with how I look but still

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I wouldn't feel exactly comfortable got it got it 

guys jump in here what do you guys think Cameron

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what's your thoughts I feel like I had like a 

little bit of a different perspective on that

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because like growing up I lived in Bridgeport like 

I shing with my black cousins and like also my

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white cousin I was really close to me but like I 

know it was different from both them but I didn't

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feel like because I was different like it was like 

negativity like negatively affected me then like

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positively benefit me but like I just didn't feel 

like a negative feeling about it and I felt like

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being different like wasn't like the name the main 

issue for me and like one thing I liked is I have

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like color eyes and like every time I go out like 

people like like they'll like compliment that and

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I like I like boost my comments but like it just 

makes me like feel like nice to have like someone

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say something like that just like it makes 

me feel better about myself got it so it's

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just hear hearing somebody give you affirmations 

in terms of how you look is what's key for you

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right um growing up because typically you didn't 

look like 100% your mother and 100% your father is

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that correct yeah got it got it Marcus what's your 

thoughts so for me I'm sort of more like Cameron

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I've never had really any problems or negativity 

about my skin color um I think it helps that I

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have a younger sister who looks so somewhat like 

me and she's like 2 years younger than me so I've

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been around with her all my life and I've also 

being an athlete there's a lot of people who may

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not exactly be biracial but they'll be a lighter 

tone and so I can have connections to them and

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feel similar to them so um you grew up Marcus what 

was the in terms of the family Dynamics uh in the

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neighborhoods you lived in was did you live in 

the neighborhood that was predominantly white

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for the most part was it predominantly black 

did you was it a mixture um same cuz Cameron

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you just said hey you grew up in Bridgeport right 

where there's probably a there's for our audience

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who may not know Bridgeport Connecticut has 

a lot of diversity has a big black not big a

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nice uh black uh uh population right so you will 

see more diversity um and then Maya you grew up

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in Westville right so was it was it diverse was it 

so my neighbor neighborhood is predominantly black

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okay and the family I interacted with growing up 

is my black of my family got it got it got it what

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about you Michaela um the neighborhood that like 

we live in I grew up in is predominantly white

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and we went to like predominantly white schools 

until I was in Middle School so that's when like

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my community changed and where in middle school 

I was able to see a lot more diversity which I

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still see now got it did that effect so did that 

have any effect in terms of where you grew up in

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terms of people you saw people that you went to 

school did that have any effect in terms of how

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you felt about yourself growing up I live in a 

predominantly white neighborhood MH but what my

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family did is they made sure that I'd always be 

around my black side of my family as well and so

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they live about 40 minutes away but we'd always 

be making trips there even later this week for

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Thanksgiving we're going we always go there for 

Thanksgiving and so being Incorporated with both

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sides really helped and made me feel way better 

about it okay cool camam growing up in like uh

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for like I moved to Milford in fifth grade but 

like before that I lived in bitor which was it

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was diverse my neighborhood was diverse and I went 

to a magnet school which is also diverse and like

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playing sports I like played sports with like 

more black people not I've Al play black people

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like when I played like in Bridgeport like most 

of the people I was playing with are black so

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like that made me like connections there and then 

when I moved to Milford it was different cuz I was

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in a predominantly white neighborhood went to a 

school that was predominantly white that was like

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different for me but I still like knew it made 

good connection with both made a connection with

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people that were like minorities and stuff like 

that and I had a lot of white friends and going

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to like high school most my friends are white now 

which is like different but I can make connections

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with both I feel like it's a little bit different 

but I just know like a condition with both type

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people got it go ahead Maya um I think while 

growing up surrounded by almost completely

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people of color it was definitely an experience I 

think I learned a lot more than I would have if my

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um Community was more diverse about what it's like 

to be a person of color but I would definitely say

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it didn't make me feel like I belonged because 

growing up the elementary schools I went to the

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people I was around they were all only one racial 

identity and so it felt very much like I just

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wasn't enough of my black side or I was too much 

of my white side so it was always like I felt like

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I belonged but not completely and that was kind 

of how it was like with friends too because when

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you're a kid or a teenager people make comments 

and sometimes they're not meant to be offensive

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but they are and you don't really know how to 

deal with that as a kid so it was a lot of just

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like I knew who I was and I was comfortable in who 

I was but then there wouldd be small things people

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said to me or small things that occurred that just 

made me feel insecure got it and let's let's let's

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build on that for a little bit you know I think 

before we started recording I told you guys that

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when I was a kid I was called all different type 

of names right and I was called these names I was

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called blacka Tar baby I mean really dis usting 

stuff at 8 n years old right but these wasn't

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white kids that called me these names these were 

black kids okay and the reason they called me that

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name because I was dark skinned okay and at that 

you know and unfortunately in our history being

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darker has always been a negative um in terms of 

black people right and you know if you're lighter

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you're better you get more opportunities you're 

you're you're handsome if you're dark skinned um

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you know you're the bottom of the bottom okay 

so picking up on you just got finished saying

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Maya in terms of the things that people would 

say and I'm throwing this out for all you guys

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and you guys can jump in and talk about have and 

you said you have tell us about any type of racial

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discrimination or stuff that you dealt with or 

slights or things that people said to you and

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then more importantly how did that make you feel 

go ahead Michaela um so building off what Maya

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said like when Maya first came to eims um when 

Maya first came to eims which is the school we

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go to um we became friends with really fast and 

we were friends before then because of zoom and

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like online school and every single person who saw 

us together would ask if we were cousins like just

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assuming that oh since we're both mixed we're a 

automatically related so we both thought that was

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weird because we don't look anything alike just 

because we're mixed it does it like it's like

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looping in racial demographics together saying 

like all black people look the same or all white

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people look the same or all mixed people look the 

same which isn't the truth right okay thanks goad

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similar experience to that cuz like when I when 

I first mov to Milford like my friend Michael

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we're we're both mixed and we're like we're best 

friends we always hang out together like in public

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and people always say like are guys brothers or 

stuff like that cousins all that stuff and I we

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don't look alike at all like everybody that we 

know says that we don't really look alike but

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it's always around public or we see new people 

they're always saying stuff like that like are

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you guys cousins are you Brothers we just don't 

feel like we look alike it's just like they're's

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like putting us together you just because you're 

mixed they immediately assume that you guys are

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related because they don't see a lot of other 

mixed kids correct exactly anything for you

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Marcus at all bu I mean even like a couple weeks 

ago I had a teacher ask if D was my brother and

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so I didn't think that that was even like a close 

comparison but happened so how does that make you

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guys feel when somebody assumes like Michaela and 

you guys all said you had the same experience how

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does that make you feel like originally like I was 

like laughing off and be like now we're not like

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whatever and then we just like joke about it later 

but like you think about it's just like it's kind

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of like annoying eventually the first time it's 

like what whatever a couple times just like all

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right but like it's like annoying people keep 

saying that and we just know it's not true and

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I feel like they're just like saying that but like 

they don't like really mean that I don't know like

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how to explain it but like they might like not 

see like look like brother just like assuming it

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together just like putting it together yeah like 

there was one time where me and Maya went to her

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mom's job like at the courthouse and this woman 

who her mom has worked with forever and has met

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Maya and her sister Sophia um and I seen them 

multiple times when me and Maya went in to talk

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to her she just assumed I was Sophia and thought 

I was Sophia the whole time thinking that me and

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Maya were siblings even though she's met Sophia 

before she's seen Sophia before she saw two mixed

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girls was like oh that's Maya's sister which was 

kind of weird the other thing that really annoyed

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me about that particular situation is that my 

sister looks nothing like Michaela my sister's

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tall and she has coils and this woman had met my 

sister multiple times I think she even came to

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like one of my sisters like grad parties I don't 

remember if she came but she had met my sister

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multiple times had met my family multiple times 

and just it felt ignorant it was like you know

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you know my sister and you don't care enough to 

recognize her face you're just assuming because we

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look remotely similar let me you know one of the 

things is and obviously that could make you feel

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like you're just putting me in a box right you're 

not really you don't have no connection to me you

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just see somebody that from a facial standpoint 

looks similar because they look mixed too and so

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I can can see how that can be very annoying 

has anybody ever said anything that was you

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know just outside of assuming that your cousins 

or brothers has anybody any said anything like

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very derogatory or stuff to that nature um I've 

definitely experienced things where it just I one

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of the moments I realized um I experienced racism 

for the first time was when I was 9 years old and

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I went to this um 4 Camp up in Hartford mhm and 

the people that go to that camp are predominantly

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white and they live in white communities they 

don't see people of color so I was 9 years old

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this is the first time I ever left my house for 

a long period of time I was gone for a week and

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at that camp we had like a camp store where you 

could stand in line and get snacks this is the

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first time I ever got my hair cornrow I all of 

a sudden felt someone run their finger down my

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cornrows and first of all why are you touching 

me and so I turned around expecting it to be

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my sister cuz she was going to that camp with me 

I thought she was just messing with me I turned

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around is a 16-year-old white girl and I look at 

her and she goes you're so exotic and that was the

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first time I was like oh this is racist what did 

you say if anything I didn't know what to say cuz

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the people there they weren't trying to be racist 

they were just unaware right so she meant it as a

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compliment to me cuz she'd never seen me before 

I was exotic to her so I said Thank you and I

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turned around and I remember the first thing I did 

when I went to my cabin was cry cuz I did not know

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how to take that I'm sorry I'm sorry about that 

any anybody else I don't think I've ever like I

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don't experienced like someone say like something 

like blatant like racist towards me but like like

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people will say like like somebody else will say 

like the N word or something like that they'll be

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like like am I going to do something about that 

like you know like and then I feel like like why

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am I going to do something about that like so say 

that again so when you say somebody says so like

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in school you know like people like some like 

somebody will say it and then somebody come to

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me and be like someone said that and then they 

like am I going to do something about that like

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that might be like offensive to me but like that's 

not like my thing to go do and something about you

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know like I'm not going to go like so they came to 

they so somebody said the N word and then somebody

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white came to you and said are you going to do 

something about it you going to let them get

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away with that right yeah and I'm like like that's 

obviously offense they shouldn't be doing that but

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I feel like it's not like I'm just not going to 

go like beat somebody up cuz they're like saying

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that right right right anything Marcus have you 

dealt with anything like that yeah from time to

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time people will say like you're not even black 

and like that's just weird to me because like I

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am black and I am white and so just because I'm 

not fully black doesn't mean I'm not black like

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I am black and sometimes I just don't know like 

how to respond to that because it's just like why

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so if somebody asks you what your racial makeup 

is what would you say I would just say I'm mixed

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michaa say she was which one would you say I 

would say mixed or black black it depends on

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the situation because like I if we can't really 

say we're white like cuz of our skin color like

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no matter what even if people perceive you as 

not being fully black we're never going to be

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white if that makes sense oh that makes sense 

Mayo how do you identify um I definitely agree

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with that so whenever someone asks me I normally 

say I'm mixed but when I have to fill out forums

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and you can only check one box I mostly say black 

and it's also because I say I'm black more than I

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say I'm white because people do not look at me 

and see a white girl they see someone of color

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they may not know who I I am but they see somewhat 

of color so within the world we live in it's not

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I have to address the fact I am black because 

that's what I'm seen as Marcus what about you

:: 20:39

buddy so I agree I would say first thing I'd say 

is just like I'm mixed but if I had to pick one I

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would say I'm black because I'm like if you were 

to draw a scale I mean I'm in the middle but I

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feel like I'm closer connected to black than I 

am to White white and why is that because just

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because my skin color is not white and I feel 

like once you get past white it's just kind of

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like you're just not white anymore like people 

wouldn't see me as white so I just don't really

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would wouldn't really say that I am white yeah I 

agree but I usually just say like someone ask me

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I'll say like I'm mix and then like even like the 

other day somebody said like I wasn't black and I

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was like but I am you know like and I be like and 

if they ask like I am yes I'm black I'm also white

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you know like I'm not like not white I'm not not 

black I'm both so picking up on that though right

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because at the end of the day you guys are both 

right you know you you you have a white side to

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you and I hate to say it that at the end of the 

day your parents one of your parents is white one

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of the other parents is black right so at the 

end of the day there is that part of you right

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but you identify with one side or you identify in 

terms of saying I'm mix correct in terms of spend

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spending time with your so Marcus you were saying 

you know your family makees sure that you spend

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time with your black relatives right do you spend 

time with your white relatives and when you do is

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there any you know does does it do do you hear any 

push back or do they you know you know call your

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names or say some things or stuff to that nature 

so my white family lives in Milford so I see them

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all the time and so they're great I mean they 

don't they're never like saying anything bad or

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anything like that they're very accepting they're 

very loving and so my black family lives further

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away and they're more spread out some of them live 

in Virginia North Carolina and so it's harder to

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see them because they're not down the street 

or just 5 minutes away and so when we make sure

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that we go to see our black family we make sure 

that we're really there we're in the moment and

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we're just taking in everything that we can okay 

Michaela um I feel like it's the same situation

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as Marcus like my white family has always lived 

closer to us since we were little we never really

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saw like our black family a lot and it wasn't 

that there was like ill intent or malice coming

:: 23:12

from our white family they're very accepting but 

it's just like some situations like if we'll go

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somewhere and me and my sister be the only black 

people like in that area and so like we notice

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it but they don't it's like oh it's fine we're 

just at a store or at a restaurant but you don't

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see anyone who looks like around you so it can 

make you feel like uncomfortable or unwanted or

:: 23:31

like walking around like with my aunt who's white 

when I was little going around her town which is

:: 23:36

predominantly white seeing people like the looks 

they would give like oh like is she adopted or

:: 23:41

like when and my aunt would explain she's my niece 

and he like okay like they don't understand the

:: 23:46

connection of like mixed families so like being 

in public with your white family versus your black

:: 23:51

family it's a whole different Dynamic right and 

and then piggy back in on that so when you were

:: 23:57

with your aunt Simone or you're around your black 

family how did you feel we weren't like we didn't

:: 24:03

have as spend as much time with our black as 

our white family I felt like more included like

:: 24:08

I don't know it was they were more I wouldn't 

say more accepting but like I felt like I was

:: 24:13

finally like embracing the black side of myself 

that I wasn't able to in my town in my school or

:: 24:18

with my other family and like I still always ask 

to see them and do stuff with them cuz it's like

:: 24:22

a different culture that I didn't really grow up 

in but one that like I want to be more in now yeah

:: 24:28

Maya um so I personally my father does not talk 

to his side of the family and if I'm remembering

:: 24:34

correctly he told me this is because the first 

time he brought my mother to meet them they were

:: 24:39

incredibly racist but even just going out with 

one parent versus another I experience different

:: 24:45

things just around people like I remember this 

is a story my mother told me she told me when I

:: 24:50

was born she was holding me in the hospital and 

I have an aunt who aunt who's um white she's my

:: 24:57

mother's friend since like law school and she had 

been holding me and my mom came back she gave me

:: 25:04

to my mom and this older white woman came up to 

her and she was like do you know this baby's name

:: 25:08

as if I was not my mother's child and even now if 

I go out with my mom or when I was little when I

:: 25:14

would go out with my Mom I'd get looks from people 

because they knew I was someone of color but they

:: 25:18

did not think I was my mother's child and when I 

would go out with my dad I would get less looks

:: 25:23

but I I think I remember when I was like five I 

was in a store with my dad and he was walking a

:: 25:28

little bit ahead of me and I was with like looking 

at the toys or whatever and this lady tapped me on

:: 25:32

the shoulder and I turned around and she's like 

do you know this man I went that's my dad and she

:: 25:36

just walked away from me like nothing happened and 

when I was little it didn't like click to me that

:: 25:40

this was a weird situation cuz I thought she would 

just ask me if I knew that guy cuz he was walking

:: 25:43

away from me but she genuinely thought I was being 

kidnapped by my own father right like it just did

:: 25:49

not click in her brain that I could be a white 

man's daughter so let me ask you guys this you're

:: 25:55

15 16 years old you're still trying to figure out 

what you want to do the rest of your lives I know

:: 26:02

Maya and Michaela you guys you know have you know 

more some more more concrete ideas you guys you

:: 26:09

know cam uh uh uh Marcus you guys play sports 

you're on a high school team um you should just

:: 26:15

be just having fun and dealing with the everyday 

life so how does it you know how does it feel

:: 26:22

to have to deal with race being at your age when 

there's a million other things that you be trying

:: 26:28

to navigate just the world in terms of how just to 

be: 1516

:: 26:34

feel like a burden do tell us a little bit about 

that um I personally feel dealing with race at

:: 26:41

this age is exhausting um so before I came to eams 

I was at a middle school that was entirely black I

:: 26:49

was the only person who wasn't like completely One 

race so we had this girl who's South African but

:: 26:57

they accepted her because she was South African 

so although she was paler than me it was okay

:: 27:01

cuz she was completely one thing so at that age 

I would constantly be asked by my peers oh why

:: 27:06

don't you say the NW are you going to say the NW 

they would call me half breed they would call me

:: 27:11

happy they would meet my mother and then ask me 

after meetting my mother if I was Puerto Rican and

:: 27:15

things like that they just completely separated 

me from my race and it felt strange at that time

:: 27:23

because I knew I was black but I wasn't treated as 

if I was m and so I remember one of like my most

:: 27:31

distinctive memories from that time was that there 

was this guy and he was asking me out and the

:: 27:36

first thing he said before asking me you out was 

I had put my hair in a bun that day he's like you

:: 27:39

didn't do your edges you didn't feel like being 

black today and it was always I felt less than

:: 27:44

them they didn't treat me equally they didn't like 

me because of that fact they would call me white

:: 27:50

girl occasionally it was just very much I was 

different from them and they wanted me to know I

:: 27:53

was different from them and even now with friends 

it sometimes gets like they don't get it and it's

:: 28:01

of course it's hard to understand something 

you're not a part of but like even last year

:: 28:04

I had a friend who would call me half breed as a 

joke and I didn't know how to tell him it wasn't

:: 28:09

funny yeah I mean this is uh number one thanks for 

Sharon um and and and nobody should have to deal

:: 28:17

with that nobody right so when you go through that 

do you guys talk to your parents about race at

:: 28:25

all I talk to my mom about it like a lot I I live 

with my mom live with my dad like we talk about it

:: 28:32

and sometimes she'll ask me like I like different 

friends you know she ask me like do you feel like

:: 28:36

more white or more black like like why is that 

and I feel like like it depend on like who I'm

:: 28:41

with kind of like the group that I'm surrounded 

with like I'm around like a bunch of predominately

:: 28:46

white people I feel like I might act like a 

little bit different than when I'm like around

:: 28:50

like a bunch of black people it's just like the 

way like it is it's like a different like culture

:: 28:54

different environment so like I'm acting a little 

bit different both times you know she do you feel

:: 28:59

conflicted do you feel pressure at all Cameron not 

not that much and I really don't think I feel that

:: 29:06

way but I don't really think okay you Marcus so 

I mainly like when I talk about race I talk with

:: 29:14

my dad so my dad like we said is black and so he 

just always will remind me when I'm going out like

:: 29:24

if you're in a crowd of people and something goes 

wrong they'll look for you f like they'll look and

:: 29:29

they'll find you first cuz if there's a bunch of 

people running away from something that happened

:: 29:35

and they can only pick a few out I would be one of 

the people that they pick out just because people

:: 29:40

can like more see black people as like trouble 

and seeing as like they did something wrong like

:: 29:49

just no matter what that's just the first thing 

that they'll think subconsciously how does that

:: 29:54

so how does that make you feel though when your 

father tells you stuff like that so I just like

:: 30:01

make sure that I'm truly listening to him and 

understanding what he's saying because it is true

:: 30:07

in this world that that would be what would happen 

and so he always tells me that like if something's

:: 30:14

going down and you don't feel comfortable to be 

around it just leave just in case just make sure

:: 30:20

nothing's going to happen and there punishment 

is going to come for you first thanks for sharing

:: 30:26

buddy um I definitely agree with that so my family 

is very open about talking with about race because

:: 30:33

we're biracial family and I definitely don't 

tell my parents everything I experienced as a

:: 30:37

biracial person because my dad is protective 

but I remember some of the first things my

:: 30:44

mother told me when I was little was that I would 

be watched um when I was little I was not told to

:: 30:49

go up to a police officer if something was wrong 

I was told to go up to a mother with a child um I

:: 30:54

was told that I'd be following stores it's just 

my parents have always been very open about the

:: 30:58

fact I would be discriminated against and it's 

been helpful because it makes me understand the

:: 31:01

world more but it's definitely tiring to know 

that you are always going to be viewed as the

:: 31:08

problem well thanks for sharing guys I mean 

that's a lot it's a it's a heavy burden huh

:: 31:15

and and dealing with the things in terms of just 

being a a boy and a girl just regular and then

:: 31:22

you got to add the component of race on it so if 

you could change stuff if you had an opportunity

:: 31:28

right now to to talk and tell the world um about 

your experiences but more importantly what they

:: 31:35

should learn and how they can make Corrections 

in terms of how they see you how they should

:: 31:41

deal with people of color just in general and 

just overall overarching just race in general

:: 31:47

where we all can basically you know drop this 

you know hopefully uh eventually Drop It where

:: 31:55

everyone could be just treated based on their 

character their content versus what they look

:: 32:00

like what would you want to tell everybody 

Michaela I feel like you have to start with

:: 32:04

education like at a young age um because ignorance 

is really the biggest like fueler of racism cuz

:: 32:11

not everyone who's being racist intends to be 

racist they just don't know if you grow up in

:: 32:15

a predominantly white Community where you don't 

see diversity where you're not being educated

:: 32:19

about diversity how are you supposed to know like 

these things and like when you say something you

:: 32:23

might not mean it with Mal intent but the way 

that someone perceives it and like receives

:: 32:27

that it can be hurtful and you just don't know so 

I feel like when you educate people starting from

:: 32:32

when they're really young like the importance 

of diversity and integrating people of color

:: 32:36

into communities and like educating them on um 

the history of people of color as well because

:: 32:41

you see in like the education system a lot of 

history textbooks they cater to like the white

:: 32:46

side or like the the white view of what happened 

they don't shine light on black people or people

:: 32:52

of color in general only time you hear about black 

people is slavery Civil Rights Movement they don't

:: 32:56

talk talk about anything else but if you start 

to educate people when they're young they get

:: 33:01

rid of that ignorance and that inherent bias and 

that way when they're older they'll be able to

:: 33:05

accept everyone as they are got it so educating 

putting it out there history sharing history the

:: 33:11

full history of everybody's contributions right 

not just a narrative of one group and start off

:: 33:17

when they're young okay that's awesome Maya what 

do you think um what do you want everybody to know

:: 33:23

I feel like I agree with Michaela education is 

really important I feel Shing stories is crucial

:: 33:29

to understanding people and recently I felt that 

race should be viewed as something that we are not

:: 33:34

something that divides us we're all just people 

and the problem is we don't provide people with

:: 33:40

information on what it's like from the other side 

so sharing stories and learning the history of

:: 33:45

what it's like to be black is important because 

it's not done commonly like as Michaela says most

:: 33:50

textbooks are written from the white point of view 

okay education but I love what you said too right

:: 33:56

sharing stories and experiences based on that do 

you talk to your white friends about race at all

:: 34:04

um I do okay so I remember one of the first times 

I ever brought race up to one of my right friends

:: 34:10

was this girl who I used to be very close friends 

with and we were at a mall one day and I noticed

:: 34:16

I was being followed and I'm used to this and I 

looked at her and I told her I want to leave and

:: 34:23

she was like why I was like I'm being followed 

she's like you're delusional you're not being

:: 34:26

followed I'm like listen you're not like me I 

being followed right now because I'm a 12-year-old

:: 34:32

walking in the store alone without a parent I'm 

being followed you're not being followed I'm being

:: 34:36

followed she's like Maya I don't want to leave 

so I left and she came out of the store and she

:: 34:40

was pissed at me and I was like I don't feel like 

being followed right now I don't have the energy

:: 34:46

to be watched right now like I'm a criminal and 

we had this really long argument where she just

:: 34:51

couldn't understand why I was upset and so I do 

try to educate people when they ask me questions

:: 34:59

like that about like why I'm acting this way or 

why I do something like that but it definitely

:: 35:04

gets tiring trying to explain it to someone who's 

never experienced this kind of thing before right

:: 35:09

right well at least you tried though right because 

to you guys's point is about education they're not

:: 35:14

aware she is wasn't aware because she nobody was 

following her she's nobody her parents probably

:: 35:19

didn't sit down and say when you 10 11 people 

going to follow you stuff to that nature so it

:: 35:24

it's important that at least you tried to try to 

explain the situation cam tell tell everybody what

:: 35:29

you want them how you going to change everything 

buddy tell tell us like Buddhists don't have to

:: 35:33

like they just don't shouldn't assume like right 

away about anything like even not just about being

:: 35:37

black just like anybody about anything about 

the mission just assume that there's something

:: 35:41

or they would white or they're black or they're 

not black you know like when someone asks like if

:: 35:46

you're black and then you say that and they just 

assume like you're not or they assume like you're

:: 35:49

Puerto Rican or something like that that's like 

the root of it like if they just don't assume from

:: 35:52

the beginning there won't be a problem MH so in 

other words no assum assumptions just deal with

:: 35:57

the per don't immediately assume that they're 

of any ethnicity or sub just deal with them on

:: 36:03

a onetoone basis right so guys you know C I mean 

Marcus I definitely want to hear from you what do

:: 36:09

you want to tell the world Cameron had to leave 

he had a uh get another appointment so I'm really

:: 36:14

excited that he came and really happy that he came 

and shared his story but we're going to finish up

:: 36:18

so Marcus what do you want to tell the world 

when it comes to race I mean just like we're

:: 36:25

all just normal kids we all wake up go to school 

do our after school activities like we're not any

:: 36:31

different from anyone else we all live the same 

basic Lifestyles and I just feel we should all

:: 36:40

be just treated the same we're all just growing up 

going through our own struggles through everything

:: 36:45

else that we have to do and so we shouldn't be 

having to worry about race on top of all of that

:: 36:51

so true my friend so true right that at the end 

of the day if everybody just treated everybody

:: 36:57

equally without race being a part of anything you 

know I just think to your point that as kids you

:: 37:04

shouldn't have to deal with any of this right you 

should just be meeting people you either like them

:: 37:10

or they don't like you or you don't like them 

just based on their personality their character

:: 37:16

not based on what they look like right and for 

you guys to come on and share these stories this

:: 37:21

is not easy to talk about I really appreciate it 

because you're educating a lot of people who are

:: 37:29

not aware of this and then there's people who 

are dealing with the exact same thing that you

:: 37:35

guys are dealing with so you're even though 

they're not here to tell their stories there

:: 37:39

I can definitely tell you that they can relate to 

what you're saying you guys are our future leaders

:: 37:44

of this country of this world you guys have 

the opportunity to help change this world and

:: 37:51

you started that not just here today in in your 

daily walk but if we can get everyone to listen

:: 37:57

to you and really take to heart what you guys are 

going through right you're 15 16 years old right

:: 38:08

our audience they have daughters and sons that 

are 15 16 14 17 would they want their kids to be

:: 38:15

ridiculed followed called names are you adopted 

you must be cousins are you know uh are you a

:: 38:23

half breed are you this are you that who would 

want that for their kids every human being wants

:: 38:29

their kids to grow up and have an opportunity to 

be the best that they can be and and Thrive and

:: 38:36

grow and be successful in any Endeavor that they 

want so if you want that for your kids and you

:: 38:45

want your kids to build up their self-esteem their 

confidence and you want the world to treat them

:: 38:52

based on their character their content not based 

on their religion or their racial makeup or their

:: 38:59

ethnicity or their sexual sexuality right just as 

a human being so these these teenagers today gave

:: 39:08

us all an opportunity to learn because these are 

our future leaders and if anything that you got

:: 39:14

out of this podcast today is that yes there's a 

lot of ignorance Michaela Maya Cameron and Marcus

:: 39:24

gave you guys not only the stories the stuff that 

they go through but they gave you Solutions in

:: 39:29

terms of how to make not just only your family a 

better place but also anybody that you encounter

:: 39:38

that just looks different than you right and 

it's important to have these conversations it's

:: 39:43

important to talk to people your family I didn't 

talk to my family about race when I was a kid I

:: 39:49

just didn't right it's important to have those 

conversations it's important when you felt that

:: 39:54

you didn't fit in to have have that conversation 

with your parents right but more importantly I

:: 40:00

love each and every one of you for coming on and 

joining a black executive perspective and sharing

:: 40:06

your stories final thoughts I think like with what 

Cameron mentioned before about like ignorance and

:: 40:13

um assuming things like um on top of Education 

I remember there was one time that I was at my

:: 40:20

elementary school which was predominantly white 

and we were there for an assembly and now my mom

:: 40:24

used to be at the school all the time she ran the 

PTO she would pick me and my sister up she'd help

:: 40:28

out with things people knew her at the school 

and my mom was white and there was this one

:: 40:32

time there was a Veterans Day assembly and my dad 

came in to speak and so people only Associated me

:: 40:38

with my white mom so when they saw my dad walk in 

the first thing someone said to me is is your dad

:: 40:44

LeBron James like being like 100% serious so like 

it didn't really resonate with me at that moment

:: 40:49

I was like no he's my dad but the ignorance like 

them not knowing they didn't mean to be rude but

:: 40:55

that's probably one of the only black figures 

they saw they had seen in their life so like I

:: 40:59

feel like if you start education at that younger 

age that wouldn't happen to Future Kids of any

:: 41:03

race thanks for sharing that um I think just be 

kind to people and don't assume one of the most

:: 41:11

distinctive memories I have regarding race was 

when I was little I was a Girl Scout and we were

:: 41:16

standing outside this grocery store and I was told 

to go ask this woman who was coming out if she

:: 41:20

wanted to buy Girl Scout cookies and so I walk 

over to her she's on the phone I wait till she

:: 41:24

gets off the phone I'm like excuse me man would 

you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies and she

:: 41:28

calls me a racial slur that wasn't even for my own 

race and she was black so to me that was confusing

:: 41:34

because one you were supposed to understand this 

in my opinion like the race thing what is this

:: 41:40

hatred that's coming towards me for no reason two 

I'm a child and three that's not even my race so

:: 41:48

the assumptions and just the unnecessary hate that 

people expel towards each other is unnecessary

:: 41:55

and it's just overwhelming sometimes to think 

about the different aspects of what it is to

:: 42:01

be biracial but just treat people kindness and 

you know just don't be scared to ask questions

:: 42:10

that aren't harmful obviously some people phrase 

questions in ways that they don't understand are

:: 42:15

harmful but there are times where you can have 

genuine conversations with people about race in

:: 42:19

a benificial way like I had one when I was little 

with this girl who asked me about my hair and she

:: 42:24

learned a lot about what it is to have black 

hair and how to take care of it and she was

:: 42:27

very interested and she was respectful about it so 

don't be scared to ask questions it definitely can

:: 42:32

work out okay awesome final thought buddy um so 

just the world is just filled with hatred and we

:: 42:41

just need to get to a point where everyone could 

just love each other for who they are and not what

:: 42:47

they are and just thinking about like the person 

themselves instead of what they look like or what

:: 42:55

like where they come from and all those things 

and that is a final thought and that is a good

:: 43:01

thought so Marcus Maya Michaela Cameron who's 

not here thank you guys really appreciate for

:: 43:08

your courage for your stories and more importantly 

Your Love of your fellow human being so as you can

:: 43:16

see I hope you enjoyed this episode of a black 

Executives perspective podcast we had four Brave

:: 43:23

teenagers that come on came on and talked about 

about their stories talked about how it is to

:: 43:28

be a biracial kid and they shared a lot of things 

and a lot and to be fair a lot of it was upsetting

:: 43:33

to me um but we learned a lot as well right is 

that even though they have mothers and fathers

:: 43:39

and they're different races they identify on one 

side more importantly even though they have a

:: 43:45

lot of Love sometimes they don't feel that they 

belong because they don't they don't see where

:: 43:51

they fit in and then the other multiple things of 

all the micro aggressions and things that they've

:: 43:57

dealt with so we need to do better we have to 

do better as a society this is there's no more

:: 44:04

excuses there's no more oh I can't you know I 

didn't know you have to know this is affecting

:: 44:11

the Future Leaders of our country and of the world 

we have to make sure that they are grow they grow

:: 44:17

up in a very nurturing area in all aspects of 

their life they should never feel a by product of

:: 44:26

anything so it's time now for me to give Tony's 

tidbit and Tony's tidbit is this every child

:: 44:38

is a masterpiece and interracial children are 

brushstrokes of Love on the canvas of a diverse

:: 44:45

and inclusive World therefore the truest Color 

of Love is found in the hearts of interracial

:: 44:53

children where acceptance understanding and 

unity Thrive and you got a lot of that today

:: 45:03

on this episode with our brave teenagers so 

thank you for tuning in to a black executive

:: 45:09

perspective please follow us give us a rating 

let us know how you like this episode did you

:: 45:15

have additional questions you know subscribe to 

a black executive perspective podcast if this is

:: 45:21

something that you want to continue to follow you 

can follow a black executive perspective podcast

:: 45:26

on all the social channels LinkedIn tun LinkedIn 

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:: 45:36

executive producer double A to the outstanding 

young men and women Marcus Cameron Maya and

:: 45:45

Michaela I'm Tony tidbit we talked about it and 

we're out thank you for tuning in to this episode

:: 45:52

of Tony tidbit a black executive perspective 

and for joining in today's conversation with

:: 45:59

every story We Share every conversation we Foster 

and every barrier we address we can ignite the

:: 46:07

Sparks that bring about lasting change and this 

carries us one step closer to transforming the

:: 46:13

face of corporate America if today's episode 

resonated with you consider subscribing and

:: 46:19

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:: 46:26

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:: 46:32

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